It's a Bird, It's a Plane, It's...
Captain Wigglybutt
By Brate
This is for Val and Jill, the two silliest MediaWest roommates anyone could ask for!
ATF Universe
"What do you mean you only have one room?" Chris Larabee was not a happy camper. Pressed into attending this ridiculous convention was one thing, having to share a room with two of his men was another. "I had a reservation for two rooms."
"I'm sorry, sir. We only have you down for one and we're booked solid. Convention, you know."
"Of course I know. That's what I'm here for."
"Would you like the room?" the clerk asked.
"Yes, I have no choice, do I?" He paid for the room and went to find his two missing men. They'd taken off upon arrival to check out the pool.
Chris found them flirting with two women. Great. Apparently Buck had worn off on them. He cleared his throat to get their attention.
Vin looked up and saw the blond jerk his head. He told JD to stay put while he went to find out what Chris wanted. With apologies to the young ladies, Vin Tanner strolled up to his boss. "What's up, Cowboy?"
"There's a problem."
"What?"
"They only have one room."
Vin took the information in stride. "What's the plan?"
"You're with JD."
"No way!" Tanner shook his head vehemently. "I had to the last time. Time fer you ta take a bullet, Larabee."
"Too bad, I'm in charge."
"Way to instill the 'team' feeling, boss."
"Tough."
Vin held out a fist. "Call it."
"No."
"Call it."
Chris glared at his friend and his outstretched fist. He sighed. "Odds."
The two men shook their fists twice before extending their fingers on the third shake. They counted the exposed digits.
"Dammit... I hate conventions."
~~**~~{}~~**~
"Stop taking the blanket."
Vin groaned inwardly. The floor show had started.
Chris Larabee was known to be a finicky sleeper. He liked things a certain way and if you messed with them he had trouble falling asleep. Turns out a tired Larabee was even grumpier than a well-rested one. Buck had said he still didn't know how Sarah had put up with him. What did Ezra call Chris? Persnickety, that was it. So, normally in a situation such as this the leader would sleep in a bed alone.
The problem with that scenario left the other man sharing a bed with the youngest member of their group. JD Dunne was what Vin's ma used to call "a wigglybutt." Seemingly never-ending energy flowed through the young agent, which meant JD was always in motion until he was completely unconscious, and even then he still would toss and turn.
Last time the men had been forced to share a bed, Vin was with JD. It resulted in a sleepless night for the sharpshooter, which is why this time he insisted that he be given a chance at a good night's rest. Luck was with the longhaired Texan and now he slept alone. Without any others. By himself. Solitary. Solo.
Vin just stuck his hands behind his head, laid back, and listened to the coming argument. He knew he wasn't going to get any sleep for a while.
"I didn't take the blanket, Chris. It's tucked in."
"I don't have any."
"That's not my fault."
"Stop moving."
"I'm not."
"You are, and you're taking my blanket."
"I'm not moving."
"I can feel it."
"I'm just moving my leg. I still have unused energy."
"I don't care."
There was a rustling.
"JD, I swear I'm going to get my gun out and shoot you right now."
"I ain't doing anything."
"You're moving," Chris said again.
"Am not."
"Well, pretty soon you'll be dead and you won't be moving or needing a blanket."
Vin mumbled, "I'm trying ta sleep over here."
"Then do it," Chris shot back.
"All right. I'm drifting off to sleep." A few moments of silence, and then a softly drawled, "There I go."
The ridiculous statement drove the laughter out of the two men sharing a bed. They hooted and guffawed and would've fallen down if they weren't already horizontal.
JD laughed so hard he started coughing. "Something's stuck in my throat," he managed to say once he caught his breath.
"Ain't the blanket, is it?"
"Ha ha, Vin." More coughing.
Vin stuck his head under a pillow.
After a few more minutes, JD's coughing ceased. Silence stretched across the room.
It didn't last.
"The bed is shaking." Chris sighed heavily.
"I ain't moving," JD insisted.
"Yer breathin' ain'tcha?" came muffled from beneath the pillow.
Chris chuckled at that, but he quickly lost his amusement and shouted, "Just let me sleep!"
JD growled, "You started it!"
"I did not."
"You were whining about your blanket."
"I... don't... whine."
Vin disagreed. "Doin' a purty good imitation of a whiner."
"You're both fired."
Finally everyone settled down and they drifted off to sleep.
~~**~~{}~~**~
The next morning, Vin was in the shower when the phone rang. Chris was sitting at the desk and he nodded for JD to get it. Dunne jumped across the bed, answered the phone, and thanked the front desk for the wake-up call. He sat at the edge of the bed as he hung up the phone. He looked down at Chris' side of the bed and remarked, "Oh, my gosh, Chris, you didn't have any blanket."
